Planting your feet firm on the ground is not always easy. When the sand under your feet sneaks away without giving you a second thought, you can’t do much of anything other than to sink an inch down.
Even though choosing to regain your wits or to barge straight into the black hole, both requires a tremendous amount of bravery; the latter is commonly considered as cowardice. Even I used to think small of the ones who give up, until I got to a point where the only thing I could do was to give up; giving into all the agony the act came with, and the million momentary excruciating break-downs it struck with. Living through it until you decide you can’t be numb anymore, demands an enormous amount of strength. Now, I think I understand crazy-famous billionaire musicians and some of their life choices.
When in the movie ‘300’, the wife tells the emperor(?), ‘Come back with your shield, or on it’ while she sends him away to an impossible-to-win war, I think what she implies is, either way she is screaming-proud as long as he fought until when he couldn’t anymore. Even though I am not a fan of the movie, somehow that shot had left an impression.
Almost everyone I know always speaks about what would they do when they get to do this and that; the false conviction of the majority of being invincible, that time has no bounds for them, that they would go catch their dreams when they turn 30, or 40, or so. Everyone including me is programmed in a peculiar way to ignore the obvious and live oblivious.
Beginning to comprehend the depth of such certain facts, learning to digest the ultimate truth of uncertainty that today is only what we have; then to embrace the wind, dance in the rain, breathe in the wild, laugh like a kid, cozy in with the loved ones….. I think that’s off to a great start to ‘own’ a seat in the roller coaster to survive another crazy ride. –
There comes a green shoot finding its way into this humongous, hideous world inch by inch from the burnt up remains of yesterday’s war field because; up is the only way, to grow is the only skill, to absorb and to provide is the only mode it has at its disposal to survive.